


pretty boy blues

by bespokenboy



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: College AU, Fluff, M/M, or more specifically college radio au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-22
Updated: 2015-05-22
Packaged: 2018-03-31 16:00:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,234
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3984127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bespokenboy/pseuds/bespokenboy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It would take Baekhyun some convincing to believe that Jongdae isn't the villain in all of this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	pretty boy blues

**Author's Note:**

> originally posted for suholiday round 3

A canned voice comes over the loudspeaker, announcing that all flights will arrive as scheduled. Joonmyun glances down at his watch on impulse, though the digits haven't changed since the last time he took a peek less than a minute ago. 

He checks the sign he made that morning, a neon yellow square of poster board with the words "Welcome Baekhyun!" markered in cheerful block letters. It took him three tries to make the poster this morning. He wasn't satisfied with his penmanship the first two times, and it took his boyfriend Jongdae to convince him that the poster was perfectly legible. 

Passengers from Baekhyun's flight file down the terminal escalator and spill out into the airport lobby. Joonmyun leans over the gate and thrusts out his handwritten sign, looking hopefully from face to face for the transfer student. Nobody's gaze lingers on his poster for more than a second, and Joonmyun's heart begins to sink as the crowd thins out. 

And then the lobby is completely empty except for a lone figure descending the escalator. Joonmyun holds his breath as the figure comes into focus: a young man with a suitcase in tow and a pillow tucked under his elbow. The man's eyes flit lazily across the lobby in a precursory glance before falling on Joonmyun's garish yellow poster. He breaks into a grin and shuffles over to Joonmyun. 

"Baekhyun?" Joonmyun inquires breathlessly. 

Instead of answering, Baekhyun scoffs with a hint of derision, "Did you make that by hand?"

Joonmyun's smile falters, and he crumples his painstakingly decorated poster into a ball. Feeling self-conscious, Joonmyun asks as cheerfully as he can, "Need any help with your luggage?"

"I've got it," Baekhyun grunts. "Where's your car?"

"Ah, um, it's by the northeast gate. It's pretty far, so we have to take a shuttle bus to get there. How was your flight?"

"It was alright. Got a couple hours of sleep in."

"Oh, how wonderful."

Baekhyun narrows his eyes at Joonmyun, trying to figure out if he's being sarcastic, but the older student seems genuinely interested in Baekhyun's well-being. 

"Here, let me help you," Joonmyun offers again when Baekhyun attempts to wrangle his suitcase onto the shuttle. 

This time, he lets Joonmyun struggle for him. The contents of his suitcase clang against each other noisily, and Joonmyun wheezes, "What do you have in here, soup cans?"

"Paint cans, actually," Baekhyun informs him. 

"Is that right? I didn't know you were an art major."

"I'm not."

"Oh."

Joonmyun waits for an explanation, but none arrives. The parking lot shuttle is too crowded and noisy to carry on a conversation anyways, so Joonmyun stays silent and tries to make himself as small as possible, ignoring the sharp pain of Baekhyun's elbow digging into his ribs. 

Slowly, the shuttle empties out stop by stop, until Joonmyun and Baekhyun are among the last to leave the vehicle. For some reason, Baekhyun doesn't detach from Joonmyun's side, even when they have room to stretch. When the bus stops at the far end of the lot, Joonmyun turns to tell Baekhyun that it's their stop. But Baekhyun is already watching Joonmyun intently, and he looks away when Joonmyun's eyes turn questioning. 

"Nice ride you've got," Baekhyun comments sardonically once they've reached Joonmyun's silver minivan. 

"Thanks!" Joonmyun beams, oblivious to his tone. "My parents got it for me as a graduation present. They thought it would be convenient for me to give rides to my friends, since I'm always the designated driver."

"You don't drink?"

"Just red wine at dinner sometimes." Joonmyun wrinkles his nose. "I'm not really interested in binge drinking. But you wouldn't have transferred to our school if you were looking to party."

"Yeah I've heard of this school's reputation. My parents thought that I would have a better chance at making something of myself here."

"Oh, so that's why you transferred?"

"Something like that. It's closer to home, so they think they can keep an eye on on me, too."

"Well, even if it was mostly your parents' decision, I'm sure that you'll be able to find a niche here in no time!" Joonmyun says brightly. "We've got tons of student organizations with all kinds of activities. It's really amazing, the variety of ways you can get involved, especially considering the size of our school."

"That sounded like it came straight out of a pamphlet from the admissions office. Did they pay you to tell me this?"

Joonmyun ignores his question because he _is_ employed by the admissions office, and he _does_ get paid to tell new and prospective students about the school's many extra-curricular activities. In fact, he has contributed to many of the pamphlets that have passed through Baekhyun's hands. Working in the admissions office is one of his favorite ways of giving back to the school. This includes helping transfer students move in halfway through the school year. 

"Just a second," Joonmyun murmurs, fiddling with his radio dial. "Let me show you one of the coolest extra-curriculars we've got on campus."

" _Hello and welcome to 99.1 Angel FM_ ," a cheerful voice announces over the radio. " _This is MC Jongdae letting you know that it's a beautiful Sunday afternoon on campus today, and for those of you just tuning in, we're featuring our sunny day playlist created by our very own listeners. So grab a beach blanket and find a spot on our grassy campus greens to enjoy the rest of your afternoon listening to your favorite tunes_.”

Joonmyun turns the volume down and proudly tells Baekhyun, “That’s my boyfriend! He’s one of the daytime hosts for our campus radio channel. I’m also a host, actually. But I do all the late night shows by myself since nobody else ever wants to do it…”

 

He trails off deliberately, hoping that Baekhyun might be interested in co-hosting his late night show. But Baekhyun doesn’t take the bait. Instead, the transfer student asks, “So you’re gay?”

“I, um, y-yes,” Joonmyun splutters, caught off-guard by Baekhyun’s question. 

“Huh. Wouldn’t have thought it just by looking."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Joonmyun asks lightheartedly, as though he's playing along with some joke. 

"Actually, nevermind. You're...a pretty boy. I see that now."

Rather than taking it as a compliment, something about Baekhyun's tone sets Joonmyun on edge. He bristles inwardly for the rest of the ride, but as he parks his car, Joonmyun smiles as widely as he can and announces, "We're here!"

Waiting for them at the entrance of the dormitory building is a skinny young man with a frizzy middle-parted perm and cheap dye job. He flicks his poofy chestnut bangs out of his eyes and waves excitedly at Joonmyun when he sees him. 

Baekhyun averts his eyes when the young man leans flirtatiously against the door on Joonmyun's side of the vehicle, waiting for him to roll his window down. Baekhyun sees in the periphery of his vision the man steal a quick kiss from Joonmyun. A chaste one, no more than a brief brush of lips, but enough for Joonmyun to giggle breathlessly. 

"Baekhyun, this is Jongdae," Joonmyun introduces, grinning widely. 

"His boyfriend," Jongdae pipes in. 

"Yeah, I know," Baekhyun mutters under his breath. 

"He's the one who moved your boxes up to your floor when your U-Haul arrived," Joonmyun explains. 

"Come on, everything's up there already! We just need to unpack your stuff and move it into your room," Jongdae says. "Need any help with your luggage?"

Baekhyun can't tell at this point whether everyone around here is this friendly or if he just got stuck with the most overly helpful couple on campus. 

They don't let him lift a finger during the move-in. Apparently Jongdae had carried all the boxes from the parking lot into the building and up six flights of stairs. Baekhyun glances at Jongdae's arms and feels an involuntary pang of jealousy. Joonmyun, too, is stronger and sturdier than he looks. 

For some reason, Baekhyun can't bring himself to like Jongdae, not in the way he has quietly become attached to Joonmyun. While Joonmyun is soft and gentle and endearing, Jongdae is too loud, too abrasive. Too much like Baekhyun. 

Maybe it's the way that Jongdae laughs too loud for no reason, or maybe it's because of Jongdae's overt skinship with Joonmyun, patting Joonmyun on the back every few minutes and skimming his palm all the way down to his ass. Baekhyun finds himself unscrewing the lid of an aluminum can filled with vibrant purple paint and thinking about how it would look good splattered across Jongdae's tan suede shoes. 

"Hey, what are you doing?" Joonmyun asks with eager interest. "Are you going to paint something?"

Joonmyun's voice startles Baekhyun, snapping his conscience back into place. Baekhyun whirls around with the intention of giving Joonmyun a response about just needing to stir the paint. But Joonmyun is standing too close, and Baekhyun turns too quickly, knocking into Joonmyun and spilling the purple paint all over the front of his crisp white Oxford shirt. 

Jongdae and Baekhyun stare at him in shock, while Joonmyun chuckles weakly, "Purple's my favorite color."

"Hey, that was the shirt I gave you for your birthday, wasn't it?" Jongdae asks, shooting Baekhyun an accusing glare. "What were you doing with the paint, anyways?"

"Hey, hey, it's okay Jongdae. It was just an accident."

"H-how much was the shirt?" Baekhyun stammers, finding his voice. "I'll, um, pay back damages."

"That won't be necessary," Joonmyun tells him firmly. 

"But...I feel bad for ruining your shirt."

"And you should!" Jongdae budges in. "He looked hot in that shirt!"

"Jongdae!" Joonmyun whispers, pinching his boyfriend. "Actually, um, there is something you can do if you'd like to help me out."

"What is that?" Baekhyun asks. At this point he would do anything to be in Joonmyun's favor. 

"Would you consider co-hosting my late night show?"

 

Baekhyun soon discovers that there's a reason why nobody else wants to host the late night show with Joonmyun. What Joonmyun calls "late night" might even be considered early morning to most people, since he tells Baekhyun to meet him at the recording studio at 2:30 in the morning. 

Joonmyun is entirely too lively for such an hour, and he’s just delighted to see Baekhyun, who feels less than half alive. He's groggy and disoriented from three hours of sleep—too long of a nap to feel refreshing, but not long enough to be considered actual rest. 

"Do people even listen to the radio at this hour?" Baekhyun yawns irritably. 

"Even if we don't get as many listeners in this time slot, that doesn’t matter because we have a lot more freedom to choose whatever music we like!"

Joonmyun is polite, but there is underlying indignation in his voice, and the tiny frown that appears on Joonmyun's face reminds Baekhyun that he's trying to be on his best behavior. Sometimes Baekhyun says things that he doesn’t really mean, and more often than not, people take it the wrong way. 

The night crackles with electricity, and Joonmyun looks scared for a moment before he leans into his microphone to announce, “Hello listeners! Thank you for tuning into the Late Show on 99.1 Angel FM, and welcome back to school! I hope all of you are safely inside right now, because it looks like there’s an oncoming a storm tonight. Weather aside, I have an exciting announcement to make, which is that this show you are currently listening to will no longer be the Late Show with Joonmyun. From tonight onwards, it will be known as the Late Show with Joonmyun and Baekhyun! Let’s welcome our new host, MC Baekhyun!”

An applause track plays in the background as Baekhyun nervously introduces himself with a “hey.”

“So Baekhyun, why don’t you tell us a little bit about yourself?”

“Well, um, my name’s Baekhyun.” Joonmyun plays a wolf whistle audio clip and gives him an encouraging thumbs up. Baekhyun snickers, and shakes his head before he continues, “I just transferred here this semester, so I’m looking forward to meeting new people and making this campus my home for the next couple of years.”

“Thanks Baekhyun! Now to kick off the night, let’s listen to _Start of Something New_. Feel free to call in and greet our new MC!”

_I know  
That something has changed  
Never felt this way  
And right here tonight  
This could be the start, of something new  
It feels so right  
To be here with you, ooh  
And now lookin’ in your eyes  
I feel in my heart, the start of something new_

Joonmyun pulls off his headphones and beams at Baekhyun. “You did great!” he gushes. “I’m so glad you agreed to join the show, because you’ll make a great host!” 

“ _Start of Something New_ though?” Baekhyun asks disbelievingly. “You really can play whatever you want, huh.”

“Hey, it’s a good song!” Joonmyun shrugs. “And yeah, basically. I play all the songs I want to listen to, and nobody ever calls in to complain. Nobody ever, um, calls in just to talk to me, either. I’m not sure if people even listen to the show, to be honest…”

He trails away quietly, and Baekhyun teases, “So is that why you asked me to be an MC? Because you felt lonely?”

Joonmyun nods sadly, and Baekhyun’s chest suddenly seizes with pity. Before he can retract and apologize for what he said, Joonmyun smiles tightly at him and says, “This probably seems like a waste of time to you, doesn’t it? You’d probably rather be at home, sleeping right now. I’m not sure why I asked you to do this, that was really selfish of me. Sorry. You don’t have to come here again if you don’t want to. It’s one thing for me to do this to myself, but to force you to–”

“Hey, no, it’s okay,” Baekhyun reassures him. “You didn’t force me into anything. I’m here because I want to be here. And I’m, um, really looking forward to doing this with you. I mean it.”

Heartfelt confessions are generally difficult and embarrassing for Baekhyun, but he tries to reciprocate the sincerity Joonmyun has shown him. And it’s worth it, because Joonmyun grins at him, a genuine smile this time. 

“I’m really glad,” Joonmyun says.

“Me too. Wait, when did the song end? Can listeners hear what we’re saying right now?”

“Oh, you’re right. The song ended a few minutes ago. We’re on air, but there probably isn’t anybody listening to us anyways. Just talk freely, it doesn’t matter.”

Baekhyun can’t help but bark out a laugh at the absurdity of hosting a radio show without an audience, and Joonmyun laughs along partly because Baekhyun’s laughter is infectious but also because he hasn’t had any sleep in the past twenty hours and everything is hilarious at this point. 

“You know what I could use right now?” Joonmyun asks, giggling already in anticipation of his own joke. 

“What."

Joonmyun grins as he clicks “play,” and Baekhyun groans when he recognizes the familiar scrape of a hi-hat in the introduction of the next song. 

_When the sun shines, we'll shine together  
Told you I'd be here forever  
Said I'll always be a friend  
Took an oath I'ma stick it out 'til the end  
Now that it's raining more than ever  
Know that we'll still have each other  
You can stand under my umbrella  
You can stand under my umbrella  
(Ella ella eh eh eh)_

“ _Umbrella_?” Baekhyun objects, rolling his eyes. “Really?”

“It’s raining outside,” Joonmyun chortles. “That’s why it’s funny.”

“Yeah. It is. Raining, I mean.”

“This is a great song,” Joonmyun continues, completely unfazed. “Tonight is a great night, and I am having a great time.”

Baekhyun enjoys himself much more than he anticipated, especially joking around with this relaxed, silly side of Joonmyun. This Joonmyun who lip syncs to songs while fluttering his fingers along air instruments, flipping his hair and distorting his facial features to convey the depth of his feeling. Baekhyun is inevitably wheezing by the end of each song, and at some point he gives up on trying to stop laughing each time they're back on air. 

"So, um, about that umbrella," Baekhyun begins when they've signed off close to five in the morning. 

"Yeah?" Joonmyun yawns. 

"I've got an umbrella in my bag, so we could share it if you want. Or you could just use it and give it back to me tomorrow, I don't care."

Joonmyun stares at Baekhyun for a few seconds in surprise. "Of course we can share it. You shouldn't catch a cold for my sake. We're going in the same direction, anyways. Thank you, Baekhyun, I really appreciate it."

A sleepy grin spreads lazily across Joonmyun's cheeks, and Baekhyun's fingers fumble as he moves to unfasten his umbrella. Joonmyun is almost delirious from exhaustion, and he keeps sighing happily and chuckling to himself as they trudge towards the dorm buildings. 

"What are you so happy about?" Baekhyun mutters under his breath. 

"I had a lot of fun today," Joonmyun says simply, leaning against Baekhyun. "Thanks."

Baekhyun grunts in response and gently guides Joonmyun by the small of his back so he doesn't stray from the umbrella's protection. 

"Are you a hugger?" Joonmyun asks when they've reached the entrance to his apartment building. 

"What?"

"Because I am!"

A pair of arms circle tightly around Baekhyun's waist, taking him by surprise. Joonmyun squeezes him and nuzzles his face briefly into Baekhyun's neck before letting go. He skips up the steps, waves goodnight at Baekhyun, and disappears inside. A tingly feeling is left behind on Baekhyun's neck where skin brushed against skin. 

 

"Hello and welcome to 99.1 Angel FM, this is your host Joonmyun–"

"–and Baekhyun–"

"–with the latest and greatest hits...and stuff we just like to listen to."

"You know what my greatest hit was?" Baekhyun asks. 

"What?"

"Meeting you."

"And there's a segue for our next song, _Getting To Know You_! Nice one, Baekhyun!"

The more time Baekhyun spends in the radio booth with Joonmyun, the more he realizes that he can't get enough of him. But Joonmyun seems to be completely oblivious to Baekhyun's oblique flirtation. Maybe Joonmyun is deliberately taking Baekhyun's hints as jokes or maybe he's just delirious from lack of sleep, but Joonmyun laughs hysterically every time Baekhyun says anything remotely suggestive. Which isn't too bad, because Joonmyun's laughter always gives him a thrill like butterflies. 

Either way, Joonmyun and Baekhyun's paths rarely cross outside of the recording studio, so those few hours spent each week squeezed into the radio booth together are the only chance for Baekhyun to get his feelings across. It feels private, somehow, even though their voices are being broadcast across the whole campus. It makes it easy to lose the professionalism when they chat about everything and nothing until sunrise. 

"What's that noise?" Baekhyun asks when the song has ended. 

"Um, I think someone's calling in?"

"What do we do?!"

“Wait, holy shit, people only call this number by accident, uh…”

Joonmyun scrambles, figuring out how to pick up the telephone. A voice comes over the speakers, and he asks uncertainly, “H-hello? Who’s this?”

“ _This is Tao, I had a question for MC Joonmyun and MC Baekhyun_ ,” the voice answers.

“Wait, you actually listen to our show?” Joonmyun asks incredulously. 

“ _Yeah, my friends and I all love your show! And we just wanted to know if MC Joonmyun and MC Baekhyun are dating_?”

Before Baekhyun has a chance to respond, Joonmyun squeaks, “Thanks for supporting the show! And no, we're just friends. I actually have–"

"–a really great song to play next!" Baekhyun cuts in. "Here's _Don't Speak_! Can't believe it's been a decade since this one came out!"

Baekhyun disconnects the caller, and the intro chords of the song start playing, followed by the breathy vocals. 

_Don't speak  
I know just what you're saying  
So please stop explaining   
Don't tell me cause it hurts   
Don't speak   
I know what you're thinking   
I don't need your reasons   
Don't tell me cause it hurts_

"I can't believe we got a caller!" Joonmyun whispers, as though the listeners can hear them even when they're off air. 

"I can't believe we have listeners," Baekhyun chuckles in disbelief. 

"Oh god, I can't imagine what they've heard us talk about on here. I always forget that there's a chance actual people are out there listening to us." With dread building into horror, he remembers, "I told you about the nipple thing last week! People _know_ about the nipple thing!"

"Hey, hey, it's okay, everyone knows about how I used to dress up as a princess every Halloween."

"But—oh god, this is so embarrassing," Joonmyun groans, hiding his face in his hands. 

When the song finishes playing, another caller comes on the line. 

"Hey, MC Baekhyun speaking, who's this?" Baekhyun answers, because Joonmyun is still slumped in his chair, recovering from the embarrassment. 

" _Hi, uh, I'm Chanyeol_ ," a man with deep, husky voice breathes into the phone. " _I was, um, just wondering what the n-nipple thing was about_?”

"Fuck, I forgot to turn our microphones off," Baekhyun realizes, and Joonmyun blanches even more. "So, last week Joonmyun told me about this time when one of his classmates pinched his nipples, and–"

Baekhyun is cut off when Joonmyun disconnects his microphone and starts playing _Stop This Train_. 

_Stop this train  
I want to get off and go home again  
I can't take the speed it's moving in  
I know I can't  
But, honestly, won't someone stop this train?_

"That guy sounded like a pervert," Baekhyun snickers, and Joonmyun reaches over to grab the nape of his neck. 

He jostles him until Baekhyun slams his palms on the table, gasping with laughter. 

“But, um, hey,” Baekhyun begins hesitantly. “This isn’t going to change things, is it?”

“What do you mean?”

“Since people are actually tuning in to listen to us, we’re not going to change the way we run the show, right?”

“You mean dick around for a few hours each night? Nah, there’s no point in trying to act like we’re a legitimate radio program, the worst damage has already been done. We’ve already talked about so many embarrassing, cringeworthy things that we can’t really save face at this point. You don’t mind, do you?”

“Not at all,” Baekhyun grins.

 

Jongdae hands a report to Joonmyun at their weekly producer meeting, beaming with delight. 

“Look at this,” Jongdae announces excitedly. “Our number of listeners between midnight and six am has skyrocketed over the past month, and it’s all thanks to your late night show!”

“Oh, that must be because Baekhyun joined as an MC. He’s really good at it!”

“I’m sure he is. Anyways, I was thinking that the three of us could have lunch to discuss some changes to the show, like possibly moving it up to an earlier time slot to reach more listeners?”

“I’ll let him know! Our usual place?”

“Yeah sure, why not. By the way, is Baekhyun okay?”

“What do you mean by okay?”

“Like, is he an okay kind of guy? He gave me some asshole vibes when we first met each other, so I just wanted to know how you guys are getting along now.”

“Yeah, definitely! He’s really funny, and he's completely unreserved. I think you and Baekhyun would be good friends, actually.”

“Is that right? Well, I’m glad that my Joonmyunnie-hyung is in good company,” Jongdae murmurs, leaning across the table to ruffle Joonmyun’s hair fondly and kiss his forehead. 

 

Baekhyun finds himself in a situation he never thought that he would end up in again, and a month earlier would have tried to avoid as much as possible. He feels woefully out of place sipping at a glass of water and watching Joonmyun and Jongdae pore over a menu, their heads bumping once in awhile.

“There’s really no need to order that many dishes,” Baekhyun insists. “It’s just lunch.”

“The portions are pretty small,” Jongdae assures him. “Nine entrees and three pitchers of rice wine should do.” 

He presses the buzzer at the end of the table, and a waiter parts the curtain at the end of their booth to take their order. When the food arrives, Joonmyun descends immediately upon the platter of noodles ordered specifically for him. Jongdae makes sure that a serving of green vegetables ends up on everyone's plate and distributes a cupful of wine into everyone's glass. 

"Don't just eat carbs, have some protein, too," Jongdae scolds Joonmyun, dropping slices of beef onto his plate. 

"Are you my mother?" Joonmyun grumbles, his cheeks stuffed with noodles. 

Jongdae sighs theatrically, and Baekhyun feels suddenly as though he's sitting behind an invisible fourth wall, watching a rom-com in development. Little business talk happens during the course of their meal, though to his credit, Joonmyun tries to engage Baekhyun in the conversation once in awhile. Jongdae, however, only glances curiously at Baekhyun from time to time, with a look on his face that is completely unreadable to Baekhyun. 

"You must feel like a third wheel," Jongdae says matter-of-factly, addressing Baekhyun for the first time when Joonmyun is paying for their bill in the restaurant lobby. 

"It's fine," Baekhyun says, though he wonders if they realize how obvious it was that they were holding hands under the table. "So, why exactly was I invited again? Joonmyun said that we were going to decide on some changes to the show, but was there anything else you wanted to talk about besides shifting the time frame?"

"Not really. What's your phone number?"

"Pardon?" Baekhyun asks, startled by the abrupt question.

Jongdae wiggles his phone out of his pocket and slides it across the table to Baekhyun. 

"Joonmyun already has my number," Baekhyun says uncertainly, but he keys his number in and hands it back to Jongdae. 

"Yeah, but I wanted you to give it to me yourself," Jongdae tells him smugly. 

"What's the alcohol content in that rice wine?" Joonmyun asks, climbing back into the booth. 

"Shouldn't be that much," Jongdae answers. "Why, are you feeling tipsy already?"

"No, I just feel really warm." 

Joonmyun frowns and presses the backs of his hands to his burning cheeks. Jongdae smiles at him affectionately and touches his flushed forehead. 

"Your alcohol tolerance is really low, hyung, you should be careful."

"Good thing I've got you to watch out for me, right?"

"...Yeah."

Baekhyun watches Jongdae with quiet suspicion as he follows them down the stairs from the dining floor to the lobby below. Jongdae ducks into the bathroom before they leave, and Baekhyun takes the opportunity to voice his concern. 

"Joonmyun."

"Yeah?" Joonmyun asks dreamily, feeling lightheaded from the alcoholic beverage. 

"I just wanted to say...when you were paying the bill..."

"Yes?"

"Um, Jongdae asked me for my number."

"Oh? And did you give it to him?"

“Yeah.”

"That's good, I was hoping you guys would become friends."

"You're okay with it?"

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"I'm not sure, it just felt kind of weird to me."

Realization dawns upon Joonmyun, and he hastily comes to his boyfriend's defense. "I think I know what you're trying to suggest, but let me tell you right now that Jongdae isn't that type of guy."

"Okay, whatever you say. I just wanted to let you know."

A tense silence hangs between them as they wait for Jongdae to return. When he does, Baekhyun thanks them again for the meal and calls up a ride on Uber. 

The more he thinks about it, the more ridiculous Baekhyun realizes he had appeared when he told Joonmyun about giving his number to Jongdae. It was a perfectly innocent request, and Baekhyun had no reason to suspect anything. He has seen for himself just how much of a doting boyfriend Jongdae is. But Baekhyun can't help but wonder how he would compare as a boyfriend to Joonmyun. 

There isn't anything out of the ordinary that Baekhyun would be able to give Joonmyun. His looks are no worse than Jongdae's, though he suspects that Jongdae looks a little better shirtless than Baekhyun does. But he knows for sure that he would be loyal to Joonmyun no matter what. And that he would stay up all night talking to Joonmyun if he could. In a way, he gets to do that already. 

After his afternoon ethnomusicology class, Baekhyun unfurls a project he has been working on since he arrived at his new school. He spreads the large canvas with vibrant splashes of color in an abstract, psychedelic-looking composition across his floor and sets to work on the finishing touches. 

Though Baekhyun is not an artist, he started painting when he realized that he had a unique gift as a musician—notes appear visually to him as different colors, and melodies burst into swirling patterns in his vision. And so one of his hobbies is to paint his synesthetic experience of music, illustrating in color the cascading melodies and decadent phrases that cling to his memory. 

The painting he is currently finishing is inspired by Liszt's _Liebesträum No. 3_ , a piece Baekhyun learned on piano a long time ago. He started playing it again recently after meeting Joonmyun, and he plans on inviting Joonmyun over to his apartment after tonight’s radio show to give the painting to him. He wonders if Joonmyun is familiar with the piece, if he knows that "liebesträum" means "love's dream" in German. 

For the first time since they started co-hosting, Baekhyun arrives to an empty studio. He has a key, but he has never had to use it because Joonmyun always arrives early. Unreasonably early rather than punctual, in fact, but that's just the way Joonmyun is. Better to be an hour early than a minute late. 

It's eerily quiet this late at night, and Baekhyun feels a wave of sympathy for Joonmyun, who has had to host the late night show on his own from the very beginning. He had teased Joonmyun about being lonely, but this kind of emptiness at this time at night Baekhyun can feel in his bones. 

The minutes tick away, and Baekhyun eventually accepts that Joonmyun isn't coming. 

"Hello listeners, this is the Late Night Show with Joonmyun and Baekhyun on 99.1 Angel FM," Baekhyun announces with as much enthusiasm as he can rally. "This is your host MC Baekhyun kicking off the night with a 2001 classic, _Get This Party Started_."

Before the song even ends, a caller dials in. 

"Hi, this is the late night show. Who’s calling?" Baekhyun asks. 

" _Um, call me Kai_."

"What's up, Kai? Got a song request?"

" _Not really. I was just wondering, where's MC Joonmyun?_ "

"I'm not really sure, but I'm sure he has something really important going on if he's skipping a show. He's usually very diligent, if you haven't noticed already. He comes in even if he has a cold!"

" _I hope he's okay_ ," Kai says worriedly. " _Tell him that we miss him!_ "

"Will do, and thanks for the call!"

Baekhyun can't even consider the possibility that Joonmyun might not be okay, and his stomach knots up in dread as he imagines Joonmyun so hurt or sick that he's completely incapacitated. He shakes away his irrational thoughts by playing more uplifting songs, and soon he gets another caller. 

" _Would you hate Joonmyun if he left the show?_ "

"What?" Baekhyun asks incredulously. "Of course not, who said anything about Joonmyun leaving?"

" _But what if he doesn't come back after tonight?_ "

"Well, I don't think I could ever hate him, and if he did leave the show, it would be for a good reason. As long as we would still be friends, I’d be happy."

He cuts the caller off from asking more distressing questions by playing _As Long As You Love Me_.

_I don’t care who you are  
Where you’re from  
What you did  
As long as you love me_

“ _Hi! This is Tao calling again_ ,” another caller says immediately after the song ends.

“Hey, Tao,” Baekhyun replies warily. He recalls that this guy had been the first caller in the history of the show, and his question had been whether or not Joonmyun and Baekhyun were dating.

“ _That song that you played just now, did you pick it because you’re in love with Joonmyun?_ ”

“I chose it because I wanted to emphasize that I would be okay with whatever Joonmyun hypothetically chooses to do," Baekhyun answers coolly. 

“ _As long as he loves you?_ ” Tao asks, quoting the lyrics.

“Well, I have no idea if he loves me or not…”

“ _So you do love him then!_ ” Tao decides triumphantly.

Resigning to Tao’s persistence and banking on the off-chance that Joonmyun isn’t listening to the radio at this very moment, Baekhyun mumbles, “Something like that.”

Baekhyun is bombarded with more phone calls after his unintentional on-air confession, but he refuses to pick up the phone for the rest of the night.

 

To Baekhyun’s relief, Joonmyun is in the studio the next night, but he’s not the Joonmyun that Baekhyun likes to see. Instead of his usual cheerful self, Joonmyun is distant and blank. Baekhyun can tell that beneath Joonmyun’s placid surface lies the unsaid, boiling slowly. It would take Baekhyun some convincing to believe that Jongdae isn’t the villain in all of this.

Baekhyun carries out the customary openings, reading that Joonmyun isn’t in the mood to do it himself. In fact, Joonmyun doesn’t say a word, and it’s like he isn’t even there at all.

“Hi, who’s calling?” Baekhyun asks the first caller of the night. They receive several calls per show now, and sometimes Baekhyun recognizes familiar voices as they become regular callers. 

“ _My name is, um, D.O._ ,” the caller says.

“Hey D.O., got a request for us tonight?” Baekhyun asks, even though there have been fewer and fewer song requests and more inquiries into the hosts’ personal lives.

“ _I was just wondering...where’s Joonmyun? He wasn’t on air yesterday, either. Is he okay?_ ”

“I’m here,” Joonmyun says quietly. His voice is low and gravelly, and when Baekhyun looks closer, he realizes that Joonmyun’s eyes are red and bleary. It’s as close to a mess that Baekhyun thinks that Joonmyun will ever be capable of looking. 

“ _Oh. Um, Joonmyun? Are you okay? My friends and I were just worried about you, and we wanted to know what’s wrong. I mean, if you don’t mind us asking._ ”

"No, it's okay, I'm sorry to have worried you. What happened was, last night my b-boyfriend b-broke up with me..." His voice breaks into a sob, and Baekhyun's heart plummets as he watches Joonmyun's chest shudder and tears drip down his cheeks. 

" _Wait. Were you and Baekhyun actually dating?_ "

"N-no," Joonmyun tells him hoarsely. "I was dating someone else."

" _But Baekhyun said last night–_ "

"Anyways," Baekhyun cuts in. "If that's all you have to ask, I'm going to switch lines right now because someone else just called in. Hi, who's this?"

" _Joonmyun and Baekhyun, hi! This is Tao again!_ "

"Tao..." Joonmyun croaks with a brave smile. "How are you?"

" _I'm okay, as long as Joonmyun is okay! I actually have a question for you, Joonmyun. Did you hear Baekhyun's confession last night?_ "

"No, I missed the show last night. What was his confession about?"

" _He said that he loves y–_ "

The song _Help!_ starts playing as Baekhyun tries to drown out the rest of Tao's sentence. 

_Help, I need somebody  
Help, not just anybody  
Help, you know I need someone, help_

For a few seconds, neither of them say anything, and they're unable to even look at each other. Finally, Joonmyun breaks the silence by asking, "Baekhyun?"

"Y-yeah?"

"Did you, um, say that you love me?"

"...Yeah," Baekhyun admits. 

"Oh."

Joonmyun says nothing after that, just sits with his hands tucked between his legs as the Beatles song continues to play in the background. His face is unreadable as he stares hard in concentration into his lap. Baekhyun swallows nervously and starts to speak so he can try to explain himself, but Joonmyun changes the track to a different Beatles song, _I Wanna Hold Your Hand_. 

_Oh yeah, I'll tell you something  
I think you'll understand  
When I'll say that something  
I wanna hold your hand  
I wanna hold your hand  
I wanna hold your hand_

Unable to believe it at first, Baekhyun feels fingertips resting lightly on his wrist. And then Joonmyun is slipping his fingers into Baekhyun's palm and holding on with a trembling grip, like he's afraid that Baekhyun will try to pull away. Baekhyun closes his fingers around Joonmyun's, and he finally glances over at Joonmyun, whose lips are tilted in a trembling smile. Their fingers interlock, and Baekhyun feels his heart swoop. 

The song ends, and someone else calls in and asks a question before either of the hosts can even make a proper greeting. 

" _Are you guys holding hands right now?_ "

Baekhyun doesn't answer, just disconnects the caller and starts playing the song _Shut Up And Drive_. 

 

It was supposed to be a clean break. Jongdae told Joonmyun that he was in the process of applying to a demanding new internship, one that would occupy all of his time for the rest of the semester. And who was Joonmyun to get in the way of Jongdae’s ambition? It was easy for Joonmyun to smile and say that he understood and that he was _happy_ for Jongdae, because he really was. 

But it wasn’t easy for him to fully grasp the idea that his boyfriend of almost a year could break it off just like that. It almost seemed as though Jongdae hadn’t even considered Joonmyun’s feelings in all of this. Joonmyun trusted Jongdae’s decision, though he can’t help but subconsciously cling onto the hope that someday, Jongdae might have time for him again.

Baekhyun is in no rush, and Joonmyun likes that about him. He has never tried to hasten the process of getting over Jongdae, which is probably going to take Joonmyun a lot longer than he wants to admit. Joonmyun’s heart is a mess, but Baekhyun is always there as a hand to hold onto and a shoulder to cry on. Joonmyun really couldn’t ask for more. Maybe it’s because Joonmyun is still holding onto the chance that he and Jongdae might get back together again, but Joonmyun has never been able to bring himself to openly return Baekhyun’s feelings. 

It hasn’t been two weeks since the breakup when Jongdae calls Baekhyun to invite him for coffee. Baekhyun is tempted to tell Jongdae to fuck off, but he’s also curious about what kind of explanation Jongdae might have for himself.

“That was pretty cold of you,” Baekhyun comments as Jongdae licks the latte foam off his lips.

“What? Oh, dumping Joonmyun?”

“He was really in love with you. And he’s hurting a lot more than what he lets show.”

“Interesting,” Jongdae murmurs. “I didn’t think he would be that affected by it.”

“Are you serious? You may have been able to walk away scot-free, but getting dumped out of the blue fucked him up pretty badly.”

“Well, it wasn’t exactly out of the blue.”

“Oh right, that internship, was it? I’m sure that if you actually cared about Joonmyun, you would be able to find time for him!” Baekhyun’s voice rises in volume, and he feels heat starting to burn his cheeks in anger. 

“The internship was just part of the reason,” Jongdae says in a hushed tone to avoid drawing more attention to their table. “We were bound to fail sooner or later. This was just a kinder way of letting him down.”

“So you’re saying that you did him a kindness?” Baekhyun scoffs in disgust. “Do you even feel sorry at all?”

“That was the most exhausting relationship I’ve ever been through,” Jongdae complains, showing his first sign of irritation. “Do you know how tiring it is to pretend like you’re perfect all the time? That’s the kind of man Joonmyun likes, a perfect gentleman, but you can only act like you’re one for so long.”

“You’re wrong,” Baekhyun retorts. “Joonmyun loves people for who they are. He would never force someone to change for his sake.”

Baekhyun knows this from experience. He has more than a fair share of flaws, and sometimes his personality is downright shitty. But around Joonmyun, he has never felt the need to be anyone other than himself. In fact, Joonmyun has a way of bringing out the best in Baekhyun.

“I’m not going to argue with you any more about Joonmyun,” Jongdae says firmly. “Because I like you, I really do. You’re rough around the edges. I like that in a man.”

“Is that what you wanted to talk about all along?”

“I’m just saying that we’d be good together,” Jongdae sighs. He uncaps the lid of his cup and tilts the last drop of his latte into his mouth. With a sphinx-like smile, he continues, “I think we have a lot in common, actually.”

“I’m nothing like you,” Baekhyun scowls. “You’re even more of a dick than I expected. This is all just a game to you, isn’t it?”

His chair scrapes noisily against the floor as he excuses himself angrily from the table, unable to spend a minute longer in Jongdae’s company. Jongdae may be as much of an asshole on the inside as Baekhyun appears to be on the outside, but one thing’s for certain. Baekhyun would never stoop that low, especially not if Joonmyun is involved.

For the rest of the evening, Baekhyun grapples with the dilemma of whether or not to tell Joonmyun. It would undoubtedly upset him, assuming that he even believes Baekhyun in the first place. But at the same time, Baekhyun’s instinct tells him that this is something Joonmyun deserves to know about, even if it might hurt him. 

In the end, Baekhyun can’t bring himself to do it. Joonmyun smiles at him when he arrives at the studio, and Baekhyun realizes that he never wants to be the one to take Joonmyun’s smile away.

“The weather’s starting to get chilly tonight,” Joonmyun says after making the nightly introductions.

“Yes, Joonmyun, perfect for cuddling up to the person you love best!” Baekhyun quirks his eyebrows suggestively and flashes Joonmyun a dazzling grin. 

Joonmyun covers his giggles with his hands before straightening out his face to announce, “So we’re going to heat things up with this next song.”

Baekhyun pretends to fan himself. “You heat me up every day.”

“Anyways, here’s _Highway to Hell_.” 

They burst into inane laughter again as soon as Joonmyun switches their microphones off.

“You know, Baekhyun, a couple days ago a girl stopped me after class and told me that she loved our fanservice.”

Fanservice, Baekhyun suddenly realizes, is one way of labeling what he and Joonmyun do on this show. But he can’t say that he likes the label.

“But I told her it wasn’t fanservice,” Joonmyun continues.

“Oh?”

“Yeah,” Joonmyun laughs, shaking his head. “I can’t believe people think that we actually say these things on purpose. I don’t think they realize that we’re just a couple of idiots with shitty taste in music.”

“Nobody who plays High School Musical as a welcome song can be considered shitty in my book.”

Joonmyun grins, biting on his lip. “I like you. And hey, it looks like we’ve got a caller. How much do you want to bet that it’s that Tao guy calling in to ask if we’re dating yet?”

“No, I think that Chanyeol guy might call and ask you to moan for him again. We haven’t heard from him in awhile.”

As it turns out, neither of them are correct.

“Hi, this is MC Joonmyun, who’s this?”

“ _Joonmyun?_ ” a voice asks in a faint tone.

Before Baekhyun can figure out why the voice sounds familiar, Joonmyun gasps, “Is that you, Jongdae?”

“ _Yeah_ ,” Jongdae mumbles hoarsely. “ _You weren’t answering your phone, so I thought I might try calling the radio station._ ”

“But...you’ve never listened to my show,” Joonmyun points out, feeling a strange flutter in his chest.

“ _I know, but I stayed up tonight for you, because I wanted to tell you that I’m sorry. And..is it okay if I request the song_ I Want You Back _?_ ”

Joonmyun is silent and frozen with his conflicting emotions in turmoil, and Baekhyun takes advantage of the opportunity to hang up on Jongdae. 

_You’re all I ever wanted  
You’re all I ever needed, yeah  
So tell me what to do now  
Cause I want you back_

“Why did you hang up on him?” Joonmyun demands as the requested song plays in the background. “He was going to say something really important to me!”

“Are you stupid?” Baekhyun hisses. “That guy doesn’t give a fuck about you at all!”

“I know you might be jealous, but you don’t have to be so mean about it, Baekhyun.”

Baekhyun could almost laugh at the absurdity of their situation. But then he remembers that Joonmyun knows nothing of Jongdae’s true nature. 

“Jongdae broke up with you because he wanted me,” Baekhyun blurts out before he can help it. 

“What are you talking about?” Joonmyun asks, with dread and hope and confusion chasing each other in the back of his mind. 

“That’s why he wanted my number, so he could ask me out on a date and tell me that he’s been pretending all along and that he and I would be good together.”

“But he just said...he wants me back.”

“Because I turned him down, and now he just wants to pretend like nothing ever happened and to go back to the way things were.”

“I don’t believe you. Jongdae would never do that,” Joonmyun says, though he begins to doubt his own words as soon as they leave his mouth. Still, his brain is working desperately to preserve the image of the man who he once thought was nothing less than a prince.

“I don’t blame you for thinking that,” Baekhyun mutters. He’s done all he can to convince Joonmyun that Jongdae is bad news. 

They receive a barrage of phone calls, but Joonmyun and Baekhyun choose not to answer any of them. They already know that the calls will be inquiries about the very topic both hosts want to avoid. They try to continue the show as usual, but all of their half-hearted jokes fall flat. Eventually they stop trying to even make small talk between songs, resigning to just playing one song after another. 

Before they leave the studio when the gray early morning sky is tinted pink, Baekhyun says to Joonmyun, "I know how much you like Jongdae. And it's not hard for me to guess what happens next. You know how I feel about Jongdae, but I hope things work out for you two. I hope he makes you happy."

"Baekhyun?" Joonmyun asks worriedly. "What are you trying to say?"

"I don't want to be the bad guy here, and the last thing I want is to get in the way of your happiness. I hope we can be friends in the future, but for now, I don't think I can just sit here and pretend I'm okay with everything. I'm sorry. I love you, Joonmyun, but I think I just need to move on for awhile."

"This feels like the second time I've been broken up with in the past few weeks," Joonmyun notes with a bitter laugh. 

Baekhyun smiles sadly and gives him a hug that lasts a little too long, giving it a feeling of finality. 

 

Joonmyun didn't expect that Baekhyun would stop showing up to the recording studio altogether. 

"Hello listeners, thank you for tuning in to 99.1 Angel FM! This is the Late Night Show with...just Joonmyun now, I guess. I'm really sorry that I've been playing only ballads for the past few shows, but I'm kind of going through a rough patch right now. Anyways, here's _Losing My Mind_."

_I parked my car outside your house  
Hope that someday you'll come home  
Seems the woman that I love  
Is someone that I hardly know  
And after all this time  
I finally found a way to be alone  
I'm terrified to think that I may be losing my mind_

Baekhyun shouldn't be listening to the radio show. The point of leaving was to disconnect himself from whatever was happening, because it could only result in more pain. But Baekhyun misses the sound of Joonmyun's voice too much. He wants to hear his voice again, even if it means listening to Joonmyun struggle with trying to put on a show by himself. 

Tuning in to the live stream of the show for the first time since leaving, Baekhyun recognizes with dismay the song that's playing. It's the one that Joonmyun had told him about not long after they met, the first song that had ever made him cry. 

The song ends and Joonmyun's voice comes back on, but it's stuffy and he sniffles a bit as he tries to speak. "That's one of my favorite songs. It's really special to me, but I have to be in the mood for it."

His voice is slow and ragged, like he's trying not to cry again, and Baekhyun's heart sinks with dread because this wasn't how it was supposed to go. He thought that if he left, Joonmyun would be free to return to Jongdae and to continue like they had never broken up. But Joonmyun is obviously unhappy, even more so than when Jongdae had just broken up with him. 

A listener calls up and asks, " _Hey, Joonmyun! Tao here! Are you still sad about the fight you and Baekhyun got into a few days ago?_ "

"Y-yeah," Joonmyun chokes out, and Baekhyun's heart drops even more when he remembers that he is, after all, the cause of Joonmyun's misery. 

" _Can I request_ Keep Your Head Up _? Because that's what you should do right now! I hope that you and Baekhyun can make up again soon!_ "

Joonmyun sits up in his chair as the song plays, but he can't hold his tears back once the chorus hits. By the time he's on air again, Joonmyun can barely speak through his sobs. 

"Th-that...was _Keep Your Head Up_...by Tupac..."

A pathetic whimpering noise escapes when he tries to hold back his sobs, and Baekhyun exits the live stream because he can't continue listening to Joonmyun when he’s in that kind of a condition. Especially since it's Baekhyun's fault that he's an emotional wreck. 

But Baekhyun can't tear himself away, either, and he soon opens the live stream once more. There's another caller on the line, one whose voice Baekhyun wishes that he didn't recognize. 

"Why are you calling here again, Jongdae?" Joonmyun demands grumpily. 

" _Joonmyun, please, you'd believe his word over mine?_ " 

"I told you already, I'm not interested. I've already lost Baekhyun because of you, and I'm honestly going to block you from calling your own radio station if you don't leave me alone."

Jongdae's desperate pleads are cut off by the same group Jongdae himself had requested a few days earlier. 

_Don't wanna be a fool for you  
Just another player in your game for two  
You may hate me but it ain't no lie,  
Baby, bye, bye, bye…_

It hits Baekhyun suddenly that Joonmyun had believed him. Joonmyun had realized, by his own intuition or perhaps experience, that Jongdae wasn't who he appeared to be on the surface. Which means that Baekhyun wouldn't have to worry about losing Joonmyun to Jongdae any more. 

"Hi, who's this?" Joonmyun answers after the end of the song, hoping that Jongdae wouldn't have the audacity to call him once again. 

But the caller on the other line doesn't identify himself. Instead he just asks, " _Can I request the song_ Hard To Say I'm Sorry _?_ "

Joonmyun's heart stops for a beat when he recognizes Baekhyun's voice. "Sure," he answers, and a smile starts to spread across his cheeks. 

When the song ends, Joonmyun leans into the microphone and says, "This next one is for the caller from a few minutes ago to remind him that he's loved." He starts the song _All Of Me_ and tries not to cry again. 

_'Cause all of me  
Loves all of you  
Love your curves and all your edges  
All your perfect imperfections  
Give your all to me  
I'll give my all to you  
You're my end and my beginning  
Even when I lose I'm winning  
Cause I give you all of me  
And you give me all of you, oh_

 

 

"Hello and welcome to 99.1 Angel FM, this is your host Baekhyun–"

"–and Joonmyun–"

"–playing for you the latest and greatest hits–"

"–and stuff we just like to listen to. I'd like to give a big welcome back to my co-host Baekhyun!" Joonmyun plays an applause track and adds in a murmur, "Who is also my boyfriend now." 

"People could hear that!" Baekhyun whispers, leaning away from the microphone, but they both know that most of the listeners probably saw it coming anyways. 

"Looks like we have a caller already!" Joonmyun announces as he picks up the phone. "Hello and yes, Baekhyun and I are officially dating."

" _Oh. Um, that's not what I called in to ask about_ ," a deep voice answers. 

"What was your question then?" Joonmyun asks, feeling heat crawling up his cheeks. 

" _I have a question for Baekhyun: after Joonmyun told you the story about when one of his classmates pinched his nipples in class, did you go home and jerk off?_ "

"I...don't think that's appropriate," Baekhyun answers uncomfortably, hastily disconnecting the caller and playing _Rescue Me_ by Fontella Bass. 

"Well, did you?" Joonmyun asks with genuine curiosity. 

"I'm going to hang up on you, too," Baekhyun threatens good-naturedly. 

They stop answering phone calls once it's apparent that nobody is calling for song requests. Even with a wider fanbase nowadays, the majority of listeners are still more interested in Joonmyun's nipples than requesting songs. 

"I actually had a song I wanted to play," Baekhyun mentions. "It's really different from what we usually play, but I hope you'll like it."

Gently tumbling piano melodies spill into the recording studio, and Joonmyun asks, "What's this?"

" _Liebesträum No. 3_ for piano by Franz Liszt. It makes me think of you," Baekhyun confesses. "The title of the song means love's dream."

Joonmyun turns towards him in surprise and doesn't even get a chance to say, "Baekhyun," before he feels Baekhyun's lips on top of his, stealing a soft, tender kiss. And then just as quickly, Baekhyun's trying to pull away again. But Joonmyun tugs on his shirt to bring him even closer. 

He intends to kiss Baekhyun until everything is forgiven and forgotten, and maybe longer after that. Maybe until he forgets his own name. Joonmyun sucks on Baekhyun’s lips and his tongue, licking the inside of his mouth and swallowing the muted sounds from Baekhyun's throat. They are breathing harshly by the time the piano fades away, and someone calls in just to tell them, " _Yeah we could hear that kiss over the air._ "

Joonmyun answers by playing _Leave (Get Out)_ and leaning in to kiss Baekhyun again.


End file.
